Toxic Mom Toolkit on Sunday Prayers of Focus

21 Jan

ff714f6d162d96e962ae3cb97d617ff2I have a Sunday routine: shower; sip iced coffee, church, brunch – and the big reward, movies. Today I’m looking forward to seeing the Ruth Bader Ginsburg biopic, On the Basis of Sex – the 12:40 matinee. But I had a small revelation in church this morning that I wanted to take a few minutes to share.


As a lesson-based church, very often, our sermons are very familiar. Because I know the lessons well, and the accompanying bible stories, I allow my mind to wander. There is something very creative about a sunlit church sanctuary and a stubby yellow pencil in my hand making notes on the back of the solo sheet. (Our solo singer’s hymn lyrics are always printed on small slips of paper so we can read along.) In this peaceful environment I have outlined two books. I have created character timelines and storylines. I’ve named characters and assigned their identifying characteristics, often inspired by bible stories. I consider it a very fluid and Zen sort of zone. Today I was writing two lists while the lesson was being read aloud: A prayer list and a letter list.


Typically, I will keep this list in my purse or on my car dash for a couple of days. I use it to focus energy for good things to happen to people I know. This week, top of my list was my husband, who has an important interview next week. Then came our friends who are selling their house – prayers for the upcoming inspections. Trust me, I am nothing like the maid in The Help, who keeps a thick notebook for prayer lists. This is an occasional and very random effort on my part. But I figure, couldn’t hurt/might help.


A member of our church has been in the hospital, and so prayers for him and for my fellow church members. Sometimes I make a little notation on what the prayer should be for.


For our local Coast Guard employees, not being paid: community support.


For a lonely friend: that she feels loved.


For another friend who just moved to another state: That she finds her tribe.


I say prayers for my two books, in manuscript: That I finish the first and expand the second.  A quick prayer for the freshman congress members.  And a few notes on how much I love my town, my region.


I nearly filled the entire sheet and I read it once more and quietly put it in my purse.


And then it hit me. It never occurred to me to pray for myself. I even noted a scribble written with my eyes closed – pray for unknown ancestors. There was just enough space under my husband’s prominent line to add: Rayne – creative energy.  Rayne, age 7, peace.


And I wanted to share this with you on a day when you could block out a few minutes to pray for yourself. Pray for insight; or strength. Pray for humor. Just remember to put yourself on your list.



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